What are sensory meltdowns? How are they different from tantrums? Sensory meltdowns and tantrums often are used interchangeably, but are actually very different. As the name may suggest, sensory meltdowns have a sensory component that triggers the nervous system. When this happens, children have a lack of control over their behaviors.
Tantrums on the other hand occur when children want their way. They can start and stop their fits at will. For example, a child cries for a piece of candy, the parent or caregiver provides the candy and the behavior stops. In the short term, the tantrum is stopped, problem solved. In the long run, the parent or caregivers just negatively reinforced a not so desirable behavioral response. There is a high likelihood that it will occur again.
Sensory meltdowns occur when there is a disturbance in the environment and the individual does not have another response. The child’s behavior happens independent of what parents try to do to help their child. A sensory meltdown is a neurological response, so the meltdown should not be viewed by parents or caregivers as purposeful behavior. It is essentially accidental behavior. In fact, no punishment should be associated with the rumble, rage, and recovery cycle of a sensory meltdown. If in doubt, treat things as if a meltdown has occurred.
Autistic children for instance, may experience sensory meltdowns with greater frequency compared to others. Autistic children tend to have underactivity in the areas of the brain that help them remain calm or regulated when upset. They may have a lower threshold for fear, or may be more apt to detect sensory or environmental changes, compared to those around them. When their amygdala, which is the “fear center” of the brain, gets highly activated, a meltdown is more likely to occur if proper supports are not in place.
Parents and caregivers often wonder what could active a child’s system to response in such a strong way. The trigger could originate from a variety of things such as the environment being all verbal; an unpredictable transition; a child needing assistance and not finding it available; overwhelming sensory issues; etc. Sensory issues can especially impact a child’s ability to tolerate the environment. Sensory stimuli such as florescent lights, too many people moving around to talking, scratchy shirts, loud sounds, strong smells, etc. can all impact individuals depending on their sensory sensitivities.
One way to prepare for meltdowns is to become aware of the rumble, rage, and recovery cycle of a sensory meltdown. The rumble stage involves small behaviors that begin to occur. For example, children may pull their hair, pace back and forth, drum their fingers, etc. Also, a sensory trigger listed above could contribute to their build-up to feeling overwhelmed. Their behaviors can be very subtle, so they can be easily missed. However, these subtle actions are how children attempt to regulate their systems. If parents can intervene here, meltdowns can often be prevented. Ideas to help disrupt the cycle include going for a walk, getting a drink of water, distracting, utilizing a cozy corner, or leaving a situation.
If the subtle signs of an impending meltdown are missed, children will go into what is call the rage stage, where big, overt, negative behaviors or withdrawal occurs. At this point, it is important to let the meltdown occur in a contained, safe space. Having a plan in place at home or school can help the whole family or classroom feel more prepared. It’s important to not restrain a child (this applies to most children, unless there is a major safely issue happening), lecture, or yell at them. This may only escalate things. In fact, sometimes restraining a child creates a larger startle reaction in them. A child’s sensory tantrum is taxing on everyone involved, but it is helpful to know that the average meltdown lasts about 20 minutes.
The final stage is the recovery stage, where the overt, negative behaviors or withdrawal has stopped, but the child is still fragile. Your child still needs time to recover and unwind from this emotional and distressing experience. In fact, if the child’s environment changes too rapidly, it may send the child back into the rage stage. It’s important to integrate the child back into their daily routine slowly, by initially placing little demands on them. Some children may need to sleep after a meltdown, others may need movement, and most need your reassurance that they are still lovable after a meltdown. Be careful about your body language, facial expressions, tone of voice, and the words that you use during this time. Don’t refence the meltdown too soon after it has occurred; this can be a potential invitation to bring on another one. There is no need to lecture a child about the meltdown, since it was out of their emotional control to prevent. You may not even need to come back to the discussion at all. Instead, teaching your child coping strategies like deep breathing, along with helping them identify their rumbles or triggers will be helpful. As the child recovers, parents and caregivers will need to recover as well. Parents should do their own recovery at a later point, apart from the child’s recovery stage. Parents can expel stress by taking a walk, getting a shower, talking to another adult, etc.
If your family is experiencing lots of sensory meltdowns, feel free to reach out to Dandelion Family Counseling for child and parent support. We can help your family process feelings, learn ways to cope, and become more aware of what is happening in the child’s body. Also, it may be important to consider checking in with your child’s pediatrician or occupation therapist for added medical and sensory insight as well.
Reference: Understanding the Rumble & Rage and Managing the Cycle of Meltdowns Brenda by Smith Myles, PhD