Children with ADHD will often be categorized as impulsive because they are more likely to behave before they think through the situation. Some teachers may report back to you that your child talks out of turn and may say or do things that result in negative consequences at school. It can be hard for your child to manage their actions, but it is possible! Trying to teach your ADHD child impulse control may be one of the harder symptoms to manage but there are ways to help your child understand behavior management that they will be able to use at school and at home. Here are a few ideas below:
- Determine appropriate and immediate discipline
If your child responds to you inappropriately or pushes down another kid while playing, respond with an immediate and appropriate natural consequence. The consequence has to be immediate, so your child understands that they are being disciplined for that specific action. If you wait a few hours to bring up the situation again, they may have forgotten the exact action that caused that consequence. The goal is to be extremely clear about what action is being punished. Furthermore, consequences should be natural consequences whenever possible. This means they have a direct correlation to what occurred. Think back when late homework was immediately counted as 50% off? This is a natural consequence. Another example is not putting fuel in your car- you run out and need AAA. That is a natural consequence. What ideas could you use at home?
- Give praise to the positives!
Parenting may be a little tricky and overwhelming at times, but do not forget to praise your child when they do something good. We tend to only focus on correcting the negatives and forget that positive things happen too! When you praise your child for doing better with impulse control, it helps them understand what the desirable action is. It helps them better understand when you consistently communicate both the negatives and the positives. It helps them regulate their actions when you can communicate effectively and consistently. Don’t forget ADHD is an attention seeking diagnosis, meaning- if negative behaviors receive more attention from parents or teachers those are automatically reinforced! Focus on the positives, and positive attention seeking is likely to be desired. Biologically, we have the same chemical reaction when we are yelled at or encouraged- this means that which ever happens more often is likely to occur in the future. How often do you remember to praise the positives?
- Make sure expectations are clear
Your child may benefit from visually seeing their routine and responsibilities. This will help them have a visual reminder of what they should do. Teachers can help by using a visual schedule with times to help them understand when they are switching topics or work in school. It can also be beneficial for your child’s teacher to use a daily report form for them to take with them. It could report all positives and struggle areas for them. At home, it could help to have a chore chart or reward chart to help them visually be reminded that good behaviors are favored. It is important to note that if this is something you have tried before and it did not work, honestly it is probably you. Most parents share they forget to follow through on having clear expectations as well as schedules. Children with ADHD do not have the social-emotional maturity to be responsible for their own schedule until almost 13 years old! Many of the expectations you have for your child may be unrealistic at their age! Want to learn more why? This is something we specialize on. Give us a call!
If you recognize these are ‘great concepts’ but you are having trouble implementing them then that is where we step in. We help parents navigate frustrations in order to best overcome them!